Housewives: Conservative and Undervalued?

By Esha Anand

Growing up, either our moms were housewives or our friends’ moms were. The Indian family structure, for a long time, has kept women within four walls to help take care of the family but gradually we see those structures changing.

With the increasing opportunities and choices, is the idea of a housewife conservative and undervalued?

We interviewed a working housewife to understand their perspective better. When asked if she believes that the household chores are largely women’s responsibilities as compared to men, she said that it is as women are mentally and emotionally stronger than men and that the entire family depends on women.

Sadly, another opinion that is not considered is that men and women are mentally equal and are equally capable of performing household chores. Many men choose not to and many women don’t even consider it a choice. For them, the choice is between being a “modern working housewife” or being a “plain housewife.” A modern housewife is one that works as well as takes care of household work. Some people praise women like this and call them “ideal” for being able to balance everything and some people criticize the same for not being able to make the sacrifice of their career for their families. Women who are labelled “plain housewives” are those who choose not to work. These women are criticized for being “lazy” and not being able to manage everything. They are sometimes praised for “making the sacrifice” for their families and are called selfless.

Does that mean that the work housewives do should come under the GDP of the nation? When our respondent was asked this question, she responded by saying that it isn't a part of the GDP as the services rendered out of love. But are these services made out of love appreciated? Even in situations where the women choose to be housewives, appreciation for their work is needed. When our respondent was asked if she had been appreciated for her work, she said yes. This is one of the optimal conditions possible. Her in-laws have appreciated her for the work she does which leads to better efficiency and motivation. Alternatively, many housewives are not appreciated and their work is treated as an obligation. They see it as something a woman should do which ends up undermining their work.

Many women in our country are not encouraged to work as people from certain parts believe that women should not be working and instead taking care of the household chores and children. This has also led to the formation of radical feminism as now there are women who look down upon housewives. What started off as a movement to empower women to make their own choices, has become an excuse for women to shame other women who do not make the same choices as them. It is ironic as some women might label a working woman, a bad wife or worse, even a bad mother.

In the same regard, I believe that every woman should be able to choose how to live their own life. Some women feel empowered by taking care of their families and some feel empowered through working. The dynamic between the men and women is quintessential as long as both are not facing any pressure from society about their “ roles ” in the family.